Writing to Renee
by mrs-I-love-EdwardCullen
Summary: HIATUS Eclipse: starting right after the visit to Renee, Bella's writing e-mails and she keeps having to stretch the truth about Forks life. The secrets get worse as Eclipse goes. The e-mails, discussions and what really happens. Rated for safety.-Rosalie
1. Chapter 1

**My attempt at a story that isn't terrible.**

**Disclaimer: No owning.**

**BPOV**

_Dear Mom,_

_Nice to see you this weekend. I'm so glad I got to spend some time with you, and I'm glad you and Edward seemed to get along well – your meeting in the hospital wasn't exactly social. I'm spending less time with Edward, as per Charlie's orders, so it's fun in Forks, though I think you're completely against hearing me say that. Today I hung out with Jacob Black, again. He's a great friend to have. _

_But I am spending most of my time with Edward. No kidding. As much as Charlie loves to be oblivious, he really needs to face facts. You did. And he stays with me every night…_

Okay. That didn't work. I couldn't write to Renée truthfully without sharing some sort of secret. It should have been easy…but I always got on the _love_ track. I thought Renée deserved the truth, that I loved Edward Cullen, but there was too much I could say that would go over the line. And I couldn't avoid saying those things. My brain was strangely wired.

So I cancelled the message and tried again:

_Dear Mom,_

_Fine. Fun seeing you lately. Glad you liked Edward. Well. Gotta run_.

That's a poor excuse for an e-mail. That's a poor excuse for a TEXT MESSAGE. I needed to get to bed. I'd reply to her in the morning.

Edward came in much later, while I was comfy in bed. It sort of included him, so I asked him about what I should do…should I avoid him as a topic? Should I let her know our feelings – the feelings she hadn't guessed, that is?

"Bella, I can't decide what you should tell your mother." I gave him a look. I'd _asked_ him, hadn't I? "Okay, fine. She's your mom. She's been married twice. She's going to understand if you tell her that _I_ love _you_. Now. Judging by her thoughts…"

I didn't let him finish. Of course she wouldn't tolerate _my_ feelings. She raised me not to feel this way. "So lie? To my mom?"

I needed his advice, the advice he wasn't willing to give. I knew exactly what he'd say:

_It's my fault you can't tell your mother the truth. After all, I'm the one you have to lie about. If you were with a normal boy, you could tell her anything. But what I am is forcing you to lie._

_No. __I'm__ forcing you to lie._

And all of the idiotic goings-on on that particular subject.

"You can't exactly lie to your mom, but you can't tell her the truth." I knew that. I snuggled closer to him, and he wrapped his arms around me.

I interrupted him. "Can I sleep now? We can solve this tomorrow."

"But you're the one who brought it – okay, fine. Whatever you want, Bella, love." I'd already fallen close to sleep in his arms.

But as I drifted into slumber, I wondered how much more difficult this would get. I'd stopped the conversation because I knew I'd have to lie – a little bit. I wasn't a fan of that, at all. And if I had to lie just about my feelings, then I'd have to ask myself how far would I take it?

**Can it stay a one-shot? I have other ideas, but if nobody wants to read it then it can hold up here. The main point is that it'll get worse and worse, because at the beginning of **_**Eclipse**_**, there's not as much to lie about as in, say, chapter 20 (Compromise, when they're engaged).**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks to MK loves tnmebd, you're the only one who reviewed. And thanks to everyone else, who read!!!**

_Dear Mom,_

_Spent the day at La Push with Jacob Black. We kind of just hung out with some of his buddies. There's a little bit of stress down there, though, because Edward isn't a Jacob fan. Sorry I've been silent since we came down…I couldn't bring myself to press 'send'. For long lists of reasons._

_Anyway, Angela Weber, my human friend,_

Oh, it was going to be like this again. I backspaced the last line.

_Anyway, Angela Weber, a friend from school, says he's jealous. No way. At La Push, we saw some animals, because there are a bunch of forests there like the one near Charlie's house. We even saw a couple wolves fighting! I'm going to go cook dinner for Charlie, so write back soon. Love you._

_-Bella._

I sighed and hit 'send'. Just because I hadn't told the whole truth, it didn't mean I was lying. Did it? My day hadn't exactly gone as I'd told Renée. I thought about the truth as I stirred up sauce for Charlie.

I'd told her I'd gone to La Push, which was true. But it had been a whole lot like my first day with the wolves. Emily had been there, and the fighting wolves had been Jared and Quil. I didn't know why I had to include that line, though. It's not like it was my entire day! But as hard as I tried, I couldn't bring myself to shut my mother out of my life. The most exciting times that I had to tell her about were the times I had to soften with words.

I pulled out _Wuthering Heights_ in my room while the pasta was still boiling. I was reading it for the umpteenth time, but in Phoenix, every time I'd been annoyed at Renée, I'd read this. Now I was annoyed at myself and it involved Renée, so I'd give it a shot.

I found myself ignoring the pages, waiting for that time of night when Charlie allowed Edward to be here. I needed to talk to him again, though I knew my mother was the least of his worries. Jacob would make a joke about it, and to get advice from anybody else, I'd have to lie to them, too. This mythical-creatures-for-friends thing was turning me into a liar.

That was one of the many downsides, along with the possibility of Victoria, or Edward hurting me (though I knew it would always be an accident), or Jacob phasing and doing to me what Sam had done to Emily, or the Volturi tearing me apart because I was human, and they could. All of these were possibilities I'd live with until graduation. Then I'd be unbreakable.

I went downstairs to wait for Edward at the closest possible place to the door. I fiddled with Charlie's dinner. I was too nervous. I didn't know what he'd say.

Of course I had to lie. I wouldn't even mention it, then, to Edward. Because he'd never tell me the only possible solution, which was to lie. He was too good to tell me that. So I had to do it. I also needed to stay in touch with Renée, and my life was too full of vampires and werewolves to tell her the whole truth.


	3. Chapter 3

**TWO-DAY POST-A-THON! I got that word from Musings of a Shaken Mind. So, if any of you out there like my other stories, Jessie Meets Nessie is getting Rosalie's Reaction today, I'm possibly posting a one-shot, and maybe even a chapter four to this! By now you've probably realized that these aren't extremely related. And it's not a very good story, either…**

_Dear Bella,_

_It's so great you're listening to Charlie and seeing your other friends. I think you've mentioned Angela before, right? Well, maybe. And hon? She's right, Edward is jealous. After all, what else would he be? Unless they've got some background fight going on, like family feuds or something, it's definitely over you. Sorry, but it's definitely you._

_I don't want you on that reservation anymore. Of course, it's not my decision, but that place creeps me out! All of the forests, it doesn't look like Forks does, that it's just green. It looks different, somehow…And, also, I lived in Forks for a couple of years. Are you sure there are wolves? A friend of your father's, Billy, said there used to be, but they died out. If they're back, don't hurt them and stay away._

_SPEAKING OF: my new hobby is __animals__. Isn't that cool? I bought out the local Borders of their local wildlife books. Florida has gators and cool birds and everything! It's amazing! Phil thinks it's great I'm taking time to learn about the wildlife near us, but can I come to one of his championship games soon? I don't know. Animals are so much more interesting than __sports__… unless I should go to the gym. Tennis, I've never tried. And is there any way I can learn to ski in Jacksonville? Help me, Bella._

_Lots of love,_

_MOM._

Sometimes, I know it's strange, I worry about my Bella. It's usually her job to worry about me, but that's different. That's when I'm doing something strange. Before her boyfriend – wait, no, a different word. Boyfriend sounds so high school. I can tell Bella has never had eyes for anyone, EVER, but Edward Cullen, and she never will, EVER. So can I just say the person she's in love with?

NO! I said it was different with Charlie, and then I got pregnant with Bella and everything got turned upside down. But I didn't act that way around Charlie. I didn't reposition myself so I could be closer to him, I didn't make an effort to make sure he's not uncomfortable, and I sure didn't agree with him with an attitude of 'it's your say, always'. And he didn't keep me safe from just mosquitoes, he didn't go cold and without a jacket so that I wasn't a little chilly on the beach, and he didn't do everything softly, watching self-control he didn't need. All of that was between Edward and Bella, and I'd never had that. So I knew it was more with them.

Anyway, before Edward, she'd written to me every day with even the most exciting things she'd done. Now she only wrote once a week, maybe, and I could hardly ever figure out what she was saying, or what she meant. She'd say the strangest things, and _as if_ that's all that ever happened to her. And she described, in her e-mails, Jacob and Edward as normal people doing normal things. But I'd seen Edward, seen how she reacted to him, and I'd heard her talk to him, heard her tell someone who was there about Jacob Black. I knew there was more she wasn't telling me. Mother's intuition.

But how could I care? That wasn't fair to her. It's not like she was saying things I knew she was making up; in fact, I knew from the crazy normalness – one of my phrases with Phil: something crazy but possible in day to day life – that she was not making it up. But the way she looked over the weekend…

That stuff wasn't the stuff that thrilled her. And I knew something back home did thrill her. And I didn't know if she was lying to me, if she wasn't telling me something, or if she was simply telling the whole truth. I had no way to know. All I did know was that one, Edward Cullen and Jacob Black were more than she said in e-mails, and two, there was something she could not tell me.

Because she would. I know Bella, and she would.

**Guys? Uh, two reviews? Please some more! I got over eighty hits!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Gah! I never update. I'm like, my own worst nightmare, only not, and stuff. I'm so sorry I don't update. I'm just an inspiration-less evil person. But judging by the reviews here, I'm only keeping three or four people waiting…**_**that was a hint**_**.**

Charlie's POV

I took off from work. I had a terrible fever, and Bella needed to go to school and work, so the Cullens offered to take her in until I got better. Alice was just here with Bella taking all of her overnight stuff, and then Bella was coming back in a few minutes to drop off the truck. Alice was coming in another car, probably her brother's. How many did the Cullens own, anyway?

I snuck into Bella's room to see if she'd forgotten anything, like copies of her classics, or whatever homework she'd been getting, so I looked on her desk. I noticed the "Bella's Computer" screensaver was running (I had no idea she was so technologically advanced to figure out the screensaver stuff – I thought that that was one of the things taught in Computer Science classes), so I knew it was still on. Bella would be gone all weekend. She didn't need this.

So I pressed the 'enter' key to jolt the computer out of its sleep mode. And I guess that triggered something, because when the screen went from black to multicolored, a message was being opened. I could see the little envelope with the letter flying out of it, and everything. It was from Renée, according to the contacts list. I didn't want to pry, but Bella never told me anything. I was her parent, too. I deserved to know what's going on in her life.

And what could she tell Renée that she couldn't tell me? _Really!_

So I examined the text before me:

_Dear Bella,_

_It's so great you're listening to Charlie and seeing your other friends. I think you've mentioned Angela before, right? Well, maybe. And hon? She's right, Edward is jealous. After all, what else would he be? Unless they've got some background fight going on, like family feuds or something, it's definitely over you. Sorry, but it's definitely you._

_I don't want you on that reservation anymore. Of course, it's not my decision, but that place creeps me out! All of the forests, it doesn't look like Forks does, that it's just green. It looks different, somehow…And, also, I lived in Forks for a couple of years. Are you sure there are wolves? A friend of your father's, Billy, said there used to be, but they died out. If they're back, don't hurt them and stay away._

_SPEAKING OF: my new hobby is __animals__. Isn't that cool? I bought out the local Borders of their local wildlife books. Florida has gators and cool birds and everything! It's amazing! Phil thinks it's great I'm taking time to learn about the wildlife near us, but can I come to one of his championship games soon? I don't know. Animals are so much more interesting than __sports__… unless I should go to the gym. Tennis, I've never tried. And is there any way I can learn to ski in Jacksonville? Help me, Bella._

_Lots of love,_

_MOM._

I needed to analyze this, because this was more than I'd bargained for.

Bella was listening to me, so that's good. But what else had she said to Renée about me? Were they having a whole 'Charlie' conversation?

And Angela meant Angela Weber. I knew her! So I _was_ involved in Bella's life. I knew, personally, the people she mentioned. So I was just as good as Renée, possibly better.

Edward? Jealous? Of who? Who else was after my daughter? I was _this close_ to killing Cullen, especially now after he left her for months, but he comes from the best family in Forks. Was it Mike Newton? Or Tyler Crowley, the guy who came here before Prom? But they had no family feuds to speak of…

Someone from La Push. After all, they'd had that party, the night we found Bella in the woods, so they must have some grudge. I guessed Jacob Black, and when she punched him. That would have broken out into a fight if it hadn't been for me…so Jacob was it, after process of elimination.

The rest was all about how much Renée hated Forks, and La Push, even, but that was all because of me and the divorce. I liked Billy a lot, so I hoped Bella didn't listen to Renée on the 'stay away' clause.

And did I care about Renée's new hobby? No. I didn't care about Renée Dwyer one bit, because she hardly talked to me, even about Bella. So I didn't care at all about her interests. Only _our_ daughter.

I heard a car door slam, extremely loudly, and then the front door practically shook the house down. And that was saying something, because my fever was dulling my senses.

_Quick Alice POV_

He'd better take the hint and get out of there soon… I don't want my angry-Bella-vision to come true…he's only trying to help…

_Back to Charlie_

I replaced everything, forgetting what I'd come back in for, and ran out the door and into my room. If I feigned sleep, she wouldn't think anything of the active computer, right?

Oh, I hoped so.

**REVIEW!!!!!!!!!!! I'll reply, and everyone likes review replies!! Heh, heh. And a new "Alice" (my account sharer) fanfic up, and it's very very good. Click my name and check out "Alice's Assignments."  
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	5. Chapter 5

**I had 50 hits for Chapter 4 alone and 22 reviews for the whole story! Come on, guys, you can do better than that! Also, check out short'n'sweet13's **_**Not Worthy**_**, a very good Twilight fic. I like to think our style of writing is similar, so if you like my style, try hers. And if you like Bella-gets-it-into-her-head-that-she's-not-good-enough-for-Edward, then read this! And it's not blah, I promise!!! **_**Please**_** read and review!**

**Oh, but not before reading Writing to Renée!**

**Also, I'm thinking of either putting this on hiatus, or taking it down. I want to focus on stories that people are reading and liking, and because of the lack of feedback, I can't know if people want me to continue or not.**

Bella's POV

I hurried upstairs to grab my homework, so I'd have an excuse to _not_ get a makeover from Alice over the course of the next few days. I'd save it, and just when Edward would tell me of her plotting, I'd get out Biology homework, insist for Edward's help, and shut Alice out with a plausible reason! It was perfect!

And maybe Alice had seen it, I don't know, so she'd been trying to talk me out of going upstairs during the whole ride home… she'd had Emmett drive his Jeep over so she could talk to me. Last minute change of the original plan, which had been Alice following me in my truck from her Porsche and then driving back together, but Alice had insisted that I not drive my truck over alone. Something stupid, probably, to insist on something else stupid. "Don't go into the house, Charlie will wake and he's sick." And I insisted, and then she goes in slamming doors all over the place! Vampires and their hidden motives. Nobody told me anything since I'd found out I'd be the weakest link in the family I loved for quite some time.

As I stepped into my cozy bedroom, I noticed my e-mail open, and, more specifically, a new e-mail from Renée. I wondered if that was a new setting on my e-mail, opening the newest unread ones, and decided I'd ask Carlisle, the most modern Cullen, about it this weekend. Emmett would know about it too, for all the time he spends being curious – so of course the internet would be this kid-at-heart's favorite toy – but he'd probably just grin at me and give me some off advice, like, "Download something called a 'virus,' it deletes all of the problems on your computer." I was smart enough to know that _this _particular possible Emmett joke left out something: what _else_ it deletes and ruins.

I didn't know why I was anticipating Emmett to act up – he was a really nice guy, a big Teddy bear, as I often thought to myself. He was kind of obnoxious, but the bond between he and Rosalie toned that attitude down, just like he got Rosalie a little less angry. From Alice and Edward, I knew she was only like that when _I_ was around, so I was grateful for Emmett to be there when I was, to make her smile.

I also didn't know why I was thinking of comebacks and responses to a joke that would not exist from Emmett's mouth, anyway. I was wasting my precious Edward time, and I still needed to read Renee's message.

_Dear Bella,_

_It's so great you're listening to Charlie and seeing your other friends. I think you've mentioned Angela before, right? Well, maybe. And hon? She's right, Edward is jealous. After all, what else would he be? Unless they've got some background fight going on, like family feuds or something, it's definitely over you. Sorry, but it's definitely you._

_I don't want you on that reservation anymore. Of course, it's not my decision, but that place creeps me out! All of the forests, it doesn't look like Forks does, that it's just green. It looks different, somehow…And, also, I lived in Forks for a couple of years. Are you sure there are wolves? A friend of your father's, Billy, said there used to be, but they died out. If they're back, don't hurt them and stay away._

_SPEAKING OF: my new hobby is __animals__. Isn't that cool? I bought out the local Borders of their local wildlife books. Florida has gators and cool birds and everything! It's amazing! Phil thinks it's great I'm taking time to learn about the wildlife near us, but can I come to one of his championship games soon? I don't know. Animals are so much more interesting than __sports__… unless I should go to the gym. Tennis, I've never tried. And is there any way I can learn to ski in Jacksonville? Help me, Bella._

_Lots of love,_

_MOM._

I read the e-mail, and was unpleasantly surprised at her quick agreement with Angela. My mother had seen the relationship better than Angela had. The only adults who had seen it better were Carlisle and Esme, but that wasn't because they could understand, relate, more, it was because they had the full picture. Renée did not, and _could _not. But she could see that I loved him! Angela could not; that was not the type of friendship we had. She hardly ever saw Edward and I away from jealous eyes and warnings from teachers.

I was not surprised, however, that she was using her past experiences in a way to disagree with Charlie without giving me reason to pull the "he's my parent too" rope. She'd never met Jacob, and she didn't know about the shape-shifting. That was probably why she was agreeing with Angela…they both were in the dark on certain important facts.

I'm glad she wasn't letting this dominate her life, though…she told me about her new hobby, which was making her happy. That was good, showing that Phil was letting her be herself and try out new things.

I was about to begin typing, but Alice came barging in. "Bella, time to _go_, you can use the computer at my house." That sounded okay to me, so I shut down the computer. _Hey_, I wondered, _why was it active when I came in?_

"BELLA, can you focus on looking forward, please?"

I knew why she was 'distracting' me – if I didn't focus on Edward, I'd discover something bad and do something bad in reaction. Even the smallest things…well, that was Alice.


End file.
